Relationships make up a huge part of our lives. From cute childhood ‘relationships’ to teenage first love and then marriage, we will probably date a fair few people in our lives. These relationships might seem like the be all and end all at the time, and we could be convinced that we’ll stay with our significant other forever. However, in many cases, a lot of these relationships will come to an end. Being in love is great, but sometimes it’s just not built to last. Breakups are difficult no matter what age you are, but how they come about and how you react is different at each stage of your life.
The teenage relationship
They say you never forget your first love. For most people, this is probably true. Falling in love for the first time feels manic and uncontrollable, as it’s something we have never experienced before. This is why it can often feel very intense and you become inseparable from your partner at that time. It is true that for some people, they stay with their first love forever. But, it is rare. Most people do eventually split from their first lover, whether that’s due to moving away from each other or simply because you have changed. When we date in our teens, we tend to be carefree and happy-go-lucky because we don’t have many worries or responsibilities. As the couple grows up and they face more adult situations, it can cause tension between them. Breaking up with your first love can be extremely distressing and you may feel like you won’t ever find anyone else. It will take time to heal, but you will love again!
The college/mid-20s relationship
Going away to college means you meet a whole variety of people you otherwise may not have mixed with. This means there’s a lot of opportunity for potential relationships. However, getting into a relationship around this age can be a bit of a grey area. Some people are still just looking for a bit of fun, whilst others are looking ahead to marriage and children. Chances are, you’ll be in a college relationship for a number of years before you either go one of two ways. If you end up breaking up, you might actually take this slightly better than you did your teenage relationship. This is not because it means any less – in fact it probably means more – but you are more emotionally prepared this time around.
When you find the person you want to marry, you enter a kind of blissful state of happiness. It looks like everything in your future is now secured – especially if you have kids with this person. Often, it all works out great and you certainly do live happily every after. However, unfortunately many marriages these days do end up in divorce. Leaving your married partner can be life changingly difficult, even if you both know it’s for the best. But there are ways to make it run as smoothly as possible. If finances or personal care is a worry for you, look around for information on obtaining a spousal maintenance agreement. It is likely that you and your partner will be stressed and prone to arguing around the time of separation, so getting a mediator involved can take some of the pressure off both of you.